At the wedding of the blindfolded lady we sat opposite a delightful pair who were back from Berlin for some of New Zealand’s summer. They told us about this “drink sensation” that had taken hold of Berlin’s young and fashionable set. Apparently this carbonated non-alcoholic tea-derived drink was The Best. I was instantly obsessed with finding some to sample. New Zealand being the delightful backwater that it is, there was nary a bottle to be found in the country, so our upcoming trip to Melbourne became a Club Mate (mah-tay) mission. I tracked down an importer, ordered a box of ten, and arranged to pick it up from a shoe store in the city. It was all so excellently cloak and dagger.

We drank all ten 500ml bottles that night with our duty-free gin. The caffeine levels were such that we became fiends. We sat out in the courtyard, surrounded by cacti and party lights until the very wee hours.

We awoke the next day to 35 degree heat and hangovers up to the eyeballs.